Some Thoughts on Pregnancy

Well, we're hopefully nearing the time when blogging is easy and all I have to do is post pictures of my adorable child (hopefully she's adorable, what does one do if one has an ugly baby?)

In the meantime, there are pros and cons to being pregnant. Everyone expects me to be super ready to have the baby at this point (35 weeks). In a lot of ways, I am. I really want to meet her and hold her and cuddle her and dress her. However, another part of me is very aware that right now I don't have to worry about her being hungry or hot or overstimulated or understimulated or gassy or poopy...I think I'll enjoy the simplicity that life is offering me right now and enjoy the mothering when the time comes.

Meanwhile...a few observations about pregnancy
1) The hardest thing about flying (in an airplane) is reaching your stuff under the seat in front of you.
2) Engineers in Virginia are much more concerned for a pregnant woman's welfare then engineers in Utah. (In Virginia, I was asked if I had emergency contact info easily available on my phone; in Utah, I was given an Ironman mug and told about someone's wife who ran an Ironman while she was pregnant).
3) People often tell you how great you look in a sort of surprised voice. This might be offensive at other times in my life but right now I'm pretty surprised with them so I just really, really appreciate it.
4) But then, people also aren't afraid to tell you how huge you look. Especially Liberians. They keep telling me I'm huge all over and that my baby is going to be huge. Well, I now have official feedback for them. I'm kind of small - so small that my belly measurements really worried my doctor. She ordered an instant (well, there was a 3 1/2 minute delay) ultrasound at my appointment on Monday. The ultrasound showed a normal sized baby - 30th percentile. "You just carry really well," she said. I'm mostly just happy because I got an ultrasound out of it and my baby doesn't look like a skeleton anymore. Plus a really large belly would look particularly large on a 5'2" woman.

5) If a stranger says something to you, even if the only word you catch is "chickens", they're probably referring to your pregnancy.
6) I've heard people say this before, but it's true. When you're pregnant, pretty much anything that happens to your body is "normal". Your mole grows several millimeters and changes color...normal. Your blood pressure is super low one day and super high the next...normal. You regularly wake up with various appendages still fast asleep...very normal. You grow three heads....

35 Weeks: The left picture I think is indicative of how prepared I feel for motherhood.

 Our Christmas Tree - just because I love it :)

Stephen off to rock climb - just because he hasn't been getting nearly enough attention and he's so dang adorable...I mean handsome.

Paper Mulberrys vs. the Saw

The exceptional service of soldiers and mothers give us the ability to make our lives what we choose. The smaller acts of service shape what we ultimately become.

Yesterday, Alisha and I spent the morning with some of her work friends cutting down paper mulberry trees in Bull Creek Park. One thing we love about Austin is the easy access to nature. Just a short drive from our apartment are dozens of trails, parks, waterfalls, etc. It's a blessing to have easy access to such beautiful places. 

Unfortunately, some unwise actions of people can endanger that beauty. One such action was the planting of paper mulberry's in what 's become one of the city parks. The trees grew well there and threatened to crowd out the native plants. So, Alisha and I got to take part in correcting the balance. Luckily, it turned out to be lots of fun.

We worked in connection with a city organization that funds care for the parks (I don't know what it's called). A few men with that organization ran the show, providing tools and instructions. George was the boss, teaching us how to correctly cut branches without breaking the tools (very useful tips). John was the man with the chainsaw. He cut down the trees while we cut them up. Then there were all of us - probably about a dozen guys and one girl from Alisha's work, Alisha, and me. We had a good time and earned a few scratches from our efforts.

It felt good to be out in the sun, working. I sweat a bit. The Texas heat is beginning. My favorite part was watching for turtles in the stream nearby during our breaks. I've always love the water and the animals in it. I'm getting in the habit of looking for turtles whenever I'm near water now. I didn't realize there were so many here in Austin. 

After about 3 hours, we started wrapping up the work. We were supposed to make it look as if we hadn't been there, leaving the smaller branches and leaves lying around to decompose. Problem was, we cut down so many trees, it looked more like a hurricane had blown through. It was kind of amazing to realize how many trees we'd cut down.

Sorry there aren't pictures, yet. Hopefully we'll be getting some soon.

And for the curious, some of my thoughts on what I'd call "Latter-day Saint environmentalism":

In a revelation to Joseph Smith in 1834 (the subject was how the Church would care for the poor; relevant to my blog, but I won't address that today) Jesus Christ taught that He "stretched out the heavens, and built the earth, my very handiwork; and all things therein are mine." He gives men blessings from the earth - food, homes, wealth - but those blessings are a stewardship, something we watch over for a time while the true owner is away. This is one of the reasons service is so important to Latter-day Saints: our time and money come from the Lord. Giving a small bit to others is the least we can do. D&C 104:11-18.

The Lord teaches that the earth will provide for everyone, but it must be done in His own way. He teaches that those who take of the abundance of the earth without sharing with the poor will be punished. While the message isn't obviously about taking care of the environment, I think the principles lead to that conclusion. If this earth isn't ours, we should probably be taking good care of it.

Another scripture, which is the LDS health code (called the Word of Wisdom), teaches that "all things which come of the earth...are made for the benefit and the use of man." But he cautions us that they are "to be used, with judgment, not to excess, niether by extrotion." D&C 59:18, 20

Mothers

Yesterday at church a friend of mine, Michael, asked if I would join him to give a blessing to a member of the ward in the hospital. James 5:14. The woman, we'll call her Anne, and her mother, who we'll call Joy, don't come to church often, so we didn't know them. When we arrived we spent some time getting to know them.

Joy and Anne lived here in Austin. A few years ago, Anne moved down to San Marcos to attend school. While there she took care of her grandmother (Joy's mother). A little later, Anne was diagnosed with Addison's disease, which affects hormone levels, making it difficult to do such simple tasks as walk. Since then, Joy has spent a great deal of time in San Marcos, taking care of both her mother and her daughter.

When we finished with the blessing, Joy came with us to the door. Michael said, "Happy Mother's Day, though its probably not the best Mother's Day." Joy responded, "When I'm with my mother, she wants me to hold her close. She tells me she's grateful that I can be so close to her. And now I can be here with my daughter. It's a good Mother's Day.”

I think of the mothers in my own life. My mom’s mom: when she married my grandfather he didn’t go to church, though he’d been raised Mormon. To my understanding, she wasn’t much of a churchgoer, either. As they started having kids, she felt that they needed some religion in their lives. So she began taking them to different churches. None of them felt quite right. So one day she told my grandpa, “Alvin, you’re Mormon, why don’t we go to your church?” This time, the church seemed right and it wasn’t long before she was baptized, bringing her husband back to Christ as well as shaping the lives of her (now) dozens of descendants.

My Grandma Pulsipher had her hands full, raising her first couple kids alone while my Grandpa flew missions in Korea.

My own mother, who didn’t let sleep get in her way. She raised 7 children while working 12 hours night shifts as a nurse.

My wife who, not a mother, yet, who looks at the little kids in sacrament, grabs my arm and whispers to me, “Stephen, look at all the babies!”

I know this is a day late, but I want the mothers in my life to know I love them. There are a lot of women out there who, married or single, working or stay-at-home, do simply incredible things. It would be impossible to overstate the effect these women have in our lives. Thank you and Happy (belated) Mother’s Day!

The Greatest Gift

I'm copying this from a service blog I started writing a couple weeks ago.

Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13

For almost two weeks now I've been reflecting on the sacrifice of a friend of mine, Andrew Britton-Mihalo, a Green Beret killed in Afghanistan on April 25. I don't have time to write much, but this blog would be devoid of meaning if I didn't post a tribute to someone who gave the ultimate sacrifice.

Scrolling through a tribute to Andrew on Facebook, I thought about my memories with him. I remember being jealous of him because all the girls seemed to like him. I remember his smile when he was with friends. I remember how serious he would get when we were about to do something challenging - spelunking, kayaking, rock climbing, wrestling. I remember the 5 months I spent on the wrestling team, when Andrew was there to back me up. When the seniors picked on me because I was the new guy (and probably the weakest on the team) Andrew was there. That year - 2002-2003 - was probably the year Andrew and I were the closest. I remember hanging out at his house, playing Star Wars Monopoly. Watching him jump off roofs. Calling me Steve-o, which no one else could pull off. I remember him struggling in the water on swim team as much as I had struggled on the wrestling mat.

I think as long as I'd known him he wanted to join the Army. So that's what he did. Why? For one, that's what he was good at. He was physical, aggressive, and driven. But most of all, as I've heard again and again since he died, he stood up for those he loved. He was a true friend, a dedicated brother, uncle, son.

I only saw him once, I think, after we graduated from high school. It was a couple years ago, right before my wedding. There was pain in his eyes. I don't know much, but I know he'd gone through some tough times. But as we chatted, I knew the goodness in his heart, the love he has for those close to him, was still there.

That's why he fought. Andrew and I were different in so many ways. But that's one think I'd like to think we share - a love for who and what is most important. He is an inspiration. I hope to live up to his memory. When I see him on the other side, I want to tell him his sacrifice was worth it, that I used the life he protected to make the world a better place.

I Never Knew...

Friday night I found myself walking from the law school to the bus stop late, with the last light of the day fading from the sky. Just past the law school, next to a chilling station, there's a small grass lawn.

A few trees deepen the darkness. I walked between the lawn and the road. Not many cars passed by and the sidewalk was empty. As I walked, a flash of light zipped across the corner of my vision. I walked on. Then another one. I looked around. Was I seeing things? Another flash in the grass up ahead. I looked at the road to see if a car was coming, thinking there must be something reflective in the grass. No cars coming, so it wasn't the reflection of headlights. Could it be...?

I paused and watched the little field. Another flash. And another. It had to be. I stepped from the sidewalk to the grass. I saw the lights, like tiny sparks, flash into existence, glide along the ground, then disappear. Fireflies, the first I'd ever seen.

I never knew how much I wanted to see them. I stood there mesmerized. For a few seconds, almost a dozen would wink in and out of existence. Then a few seconds would pass without anything. Then one or two more glows. An unpredictable, spectacular, miraculous little light show.

I never knew how beautiful they are. I never knew how incredible. I felt a sense of awe I've only felt a few times in my life. The last time I can remember feeling it, I was walking home to my flat in Australia. I looked up in the sky and saw a familiar sight - Orion. But Orion was upside-down. I'd never thought I wanted to see that so much. But once I did, I fell in love with the sight. All my life I'd been taught that Australia is on the other side of the world. That night, for the first time, I knew it for myself. I still feel that awe every time I see the familiar shape in the sky.

Wrong Turns

A few weeks ago, Stephen and I were out shopping for a kitchen table (we've decided it's time to upgrade from our card table). We decided to try Crate and Barrel, but quickly realized it was a bit out of our price range. We were shaking our heads at one price tag when another customer walked by us and suggested "Try craigslist" in a hushed, conspiratorial tone. We're obviously not the Crate and Barrel type, I suppose.
So we headed home, tired and out of ideas. However, we were met with an unexpected detour when Stephen missed the turn for our highway. I'll admit it; I groaned. I always want Stephen to drive but I know better how to get around since I'm the one with the car all week.
"Maybe we'll find another furniture place," I offered, trying to be cheerful.
And that is exactly what we did. It was reasonably priced as well and made our table shopping trip seem much more worthwhile. That wasn't the best part of our wrong turn though.
Right next to the furniture store was a little exotic pets shop. We decided to check it out. It was a tiny little place, stuffed with freaky looking spiders, boa constrictors, baby ferrets and fat wet, pacmans (pacmen?). I wanted to bring home a chameleon but Stephen said no.

After spending an enjoyable half hour, we were exiting the store only to notice a sign saying "If you don't see the sloth, it's sleeping in the blue bin". What?! We looked up and two yellow eyes and were peaking up under the lid of the blue bin. Out reached a two toed claw like the top of a coat hanger. The claw grasped the branch above it and out came the rest of the sloth. It slowly made its rounds around the artificial tree, one claw after another. I was vaguely afraid it would fall as I couldn't imagine it ever being able to get anywhere once it hit the ground, but it made it safely back to its blue bin, climbed in and disappeared from sight.

I promised myself not to chew Stephen out for wrong turns any more. 


(In case you're wondering, we still haven't decided on a table...)

*****************************************

Since before we moved to Austin we’ve wanted to go to Alamo Drafthouse. It’s a movie theater with a twist – they serve you dinner and drinks during the movie. When we got a 2 for 1 coupon, we figured our time had come! All we needed was a movie we both wanted to watch in theaters (turns out I enjoy movie theaters a lot more than Alisha). Along came Hunger Games.
So, with the perfect combination – a theater we could splurge on (the Provo dollar theater spoiled us) and a movie we both were excited about – we headed for the theater. That night my law society had a closing social down by the lake (I’m always confused because I’m pretty sure it’s just a river), so we thought we’d stop by there and then go to the Alamo Drafthouse on S. Lamar. So, as we headed out the door, I typed “Alamo Drafthouse S. Lamar” into my iPod touch and got directions.

The closing social was nice. We grabbed some food and chatted with a few people from my society. After about an hour we took off. Alisha pulled up the directions on my iPod. Soon we arrived in Zilker Park. But the directions said we only had a few hundred feet left. Yup, turns out typing “Alamo Drafthouse S. Lamar” takes you to the middle of Zilker Park. Anyway, eventually we made it to the theater (S. Lamar was just a little further east), but by this time we were way too late for the movie. We’d come all this way, so we decided we’d go to the 9:45 showing (we’d been aiming for 7:25).
So what to do for two hours? First, we stopped at World Spirit Books, From Alchemy to Zen. While Alisha found a book about how to half your grocery bill, I found a book written by Robert, channeling Speaks Many Truths, revealing that the planet earth is on loan from Sirius (or some other star). Later I read Magick Herbes while Alisha read about crystal balls. We left the bookstore much enlightened about the mysteries of the world, but still unsure about what to do with the hour and a half we still had left. I thought a walk sounded nice, so we headed onto the residential street we saw nearby. I thought we were just taking a stroll in a nice neighborhood. Little did I know, I was about to learn just what makes Austin so weird.
The first indication came as we passed the first house. The alley between the house and the shops we’d just left was covered with flowers and leaves painted on the asphalt and walls. We approached the house and found a sparkling, colorful place with a sign in front proclaiming, “Great for Kids!” We looked at each other, realizing we weren’t in Kansas anymore.

Next came the six foot tall floating egg. At the end of the street sat a house with a wooden egg hanging from the tree on the front lawn. It’s purpose? Art, I suppose. OTher than that the house seemed normal. We took a right, wondering what would come next. Our eyes were met with a bewildering variety of houses – cute little single-family homes, nice looking townhouse like homes. Then huge, overgrown bushes – apparantly someone likes their privacy. At one point the tops of the bushes dropped so we caught a glimpse of the house and saw a room with walls almost entirely made of glass. Right next door we encountered a tiny little house, sitting in the shadows of the giant yucca-like plants (someday I’ll know what they are) in its front yard.

Then I looked in the street and thought I really was in Oz, or at least Australia. In the middle of this tiny street there was an island with plants – something I’ve only seen in Sydney. Not to mention the sign that warned of “Street Humps.”
And in the midst of all these nice homey little houses, this fortress.

Finally, our dream house. We liked the porch and balcony.

To sum it all up, Saturday night we encountered the weirdness of Austin.

BIg News…

There are two main occasions when I really wish we had kids already: when I’m bored in church, watching laughing babies bounce up and down, toddlers trying repeatedly to sneak out of the chapel or onto the stand, and mothers trying to stop kids from flying Buzz Lightyear into the air and yelling “and beyond” (that was church today)…and when I’m trying to find something to blog about. Baby pictures look like they make blogging so easy. Hmmm….tempting. But no, I’m not pregnant (I know that’s the question that’s running through at least some minds). So here’s our babyless update on life :)


Stephen’s update:
So, over the winter break I spent too much time playing Civilization. In the game, you can choose “civics” for your civilization that give different bonuses. You choose slavery, feudalism, even emancipation. Being the good-natured gamer I am, I like to get to emancipation quickly. Unfortunately I’m not as lucky as my virtual citizens. There are some elements of the modern, real world that aren’t in such a big hurry. In fact, the recession has actually pushed society backwards. Back in the “boom” years, as some lawyers call it, law students could fairly easily get high paying summer clerkships during their first summer. Post recession, however, only the very top students (top 25% or so at UT) get these clerkships. The rest of us compete to offer our services for free to whoever will take us. That’s right – we compete to be slaves.
Fortunately, I’ve approached the end of my part in the competition. I’ve received an offer from the State Office of Administrative Hearings right here in Austin. It’s perfect for so many reasons, but I won’t bore you with the details. The best two things are that it’s here in Austin, so Alisha and I won’t have to be separated (we’re kinda spoiled that way) and I’ll learn about several different areas of the law.

Alisha’s update:
I feel like my life is pretty stable compared to Stephen’s. No long breaks. No insane exams to take. No worries about summer internships. Just work. Every day.
I’ve really been enjoying my job, though. It’s an environment involving rubber band wars, taco deli Fridays, and building Lego robots when you have extra time. As long as you don’t knock over a VP with a scooter (which apparently has happened) and you do your work excellently, things are pretty easy going. I’ve recently moved up to support a more specialized line of products. I support “distributed controls” which basically means that I support devices that you can stick in a rainforest or on a glacier for ten years at a time and acquire updates continuously and wirelessly. That kind of thing. It’s fun to  talk to customers about what they’re doing with our devices: coding the controls for crash tests, testing DNA by the billions for identification purposes, something involving sheep on treadmills. NI doesn’t necessarily make things that are cool by themselves, but we like to take some credit for all the cool things we enable.


A few pictures of our recent life:

These are pictures from a recent hike we went on with the Jeff and Jessica Kitchen and Chad and Leilani Williams. Most of the pictures are courtesy of Leilani, who is much more attentive to her camera than Stephen and I have ever been. We had our own little adventure right in the middle of Austin, complete with rock-climbing,  rock skipping, tree shimmying, and stream hopping. There were blood and bruises and laughter. Aren’t the boys cute on their rock?

I bought these for Alisha for Valentine’s Day. Now she knows I love her .
I also took her to the Turquoise Grill, where we drank some delicious Ayran, a Turkish yogurt drink you should all try at some point. Don’t put it off! (Really, it seems that Turks like to put yogurt in everything: you could drink yogurt, eat yogurt, get anything smothered in yogurt) The best part, though, was the lamb chops. Not only was it the most expensive plate on the menu, it tasted great. I’ve fallen in love with lamb since Australia, but it’s always so expensive here. I’m sure Americans could improve the environment and save some money by raising more sheep and fewer cows. Afterwards we joined some friends to watch Sherlock Holmes, where we enjoyed lots of slow motion shots of trees exploding and mental, telepathic boxing/chess matches.